It’s becoming harder and harder nowadays to truly appreciate ourselves. From the beautiful models we see on Instagram to the geniuses we hear about in the news, it’s often hard to be proud of our achievements. This, combined with the consequences of the pandemic, the wars and tragic events of the world, and skyrocketing rates of depression and mental illness, have caused self-esteem to drop to an all-time low. So if you are experiencing a lack of confidence, self-esteem, or meaning in life, follow along as we have much to discuss.
You’re not exercising regularly.
Did you know that exercise is so effective that instead of using antidepressants for patients afflicted with mild depression and trauma, researchers used to exercise and found it more effective? Exercise can be a fantastic way to truly push you to your limits while feeling like you’re being productive at the same time. In addition, being athletic, strong, and muscular gives a feeling of confidence to nearly anyone with these traits. Finally, exercise is magical; no other activity can make you feel more in touch with your body. There’s something about completely knowing the intricacies of your body that make you feel more comfortable inside it. However, those who exercise should proceed cautiously to avoid the following topic.
Let me preface this by saying that merely disliking your body is not body dysmorphia. Body dysmorphia is finding every fault in your physique, looks, or attractiveness and criticizing it profusely. This can lead to an expensive treatment to “fix” the particular part the person hates.
For example, if you hate your skin, you might spend hundreds of dollars on skincare products and placebo yourself into thinking they actually work. Do you hate your nose? In extreme cases, you might consider getting plastic surgery or other colossal measures to “fix” your face. Let me tell you firsthand this will not help.
Finding your style, working out, avoiding social media, realizing the photoshop that goes into every picture you see on the internet, discovering the effects of angles and lighting, and going to an accredited therapist or counselor are some of the many tips I could give to avoid body dysmorphia.
To keep this blog short, I’ll leave this topic here. However, I might consider making an entire post about this topic.
I’m sure we’ve all been lonely before. It’s a terrible feeling. You blame yourself for your own isolation often. You ask repeatedly,
“What’s wrong with me? Why do people not like me?”
Nothing, my friend. Nothing is wrong with you. Trust me, more people appreciate you than you think. Of course, if you’re lonely because you’re a hindrance to your peers and encourage toxic attitudes, then yeah, you’re going to be alone, and that’s the consequence. More people like you than you probably think.
I’m not saying to merely “stop being shy,” as that’s stupid, counterintuitive, and never works. However, it never hurts to start out slow. Say hello to a neighbor you occasionally see. Strike up a small conversation with them. Engage in small talk, and keep it short and light. SLOWLY build up if you want to build more friends. Also, make sure to appreciate your friends; they want to have fun just as much as you do.
Loss of Purpose
There’s nothing more dreadful than realizing there’s no specific purpose you’re chasing. Life is beautiful in many ways. Despite that, if one can’t realize why they’re alive in the first place, life can be a chore instead of an experience. Finding a purpose in your life can be difficult, and it won’t happen fast.
To find your purpose, I recommend creating a hobby you really like to do. Obviously, I don’t just mean sitting in your bed and watching Netflix while playing video games on your phone and talking to your best friend on facetime. You should try and find something productive about what you do. Do you love to watch movies? Maybe make a website that reviews movies and what you liked and didn’t. Do you love to play sports? Try becoming a star athlete, and if that doesn’t sound like your cup of tea, teach others to play the sport or join a fantasy league.
The purpose is often making what we find attractive profitable. If you can find an outlet to express something you love to do while making a profit that is decent enough for you, you’ll find your purpose quick enough.
We’ve all had toxicity in our lives to varying degrees. Abusive parents, cheating girlfriends, and manipulative friends are among some of the many examples we experience toxicity in the world we live in. Often, this toxicity can make us start to doubt ourselves. The horrible words people say plague our minds, toxic fumes seeping into our brains and infecting every thought.
“They’re right… I messed up. I need to be better. It’s my fault…”
NO. Clearly, anyone who is aggressively toxic to you should never be considered seriously. If you’re dealing with abusive parents, call this number: 800-799-7233. The same applies if you’re dealing with an abusive partner. Otherwise, cut out those who pollute your life if you can. If you can’t, seek ways to avoid them as much as possible. Don’t entertain toxicity, as it only lives as long as it is fed.
Excessive Social Media Use or Not?
It is straightforward to fake a fantastic life on social media. Angles, fake smiles, photoshopped bodies, rented cars, and straight-up lies pollute the entirety of the industry. It can be easy to look down on your own life when your peers constantly go to concerts, buy expensive food, and live seemingly better lives than you.
I guarantee you, however, that 99% of these events do not happen often. There are many ways to fake happiness; don’t think everyone is happier than you. However, above all else, you SHOULDN’T be basing your happiness off the happiness of others. Even if everyone is having a fantastic time, why should this impact you? Learning to build a system of happiness for yourself is actually what’s important.
“Wait, Maverick, did you actually make this entire subject just to disagree entirely with it?”
To that, my friend, I answer you,
Build a system of self-reliance and happiness
Codependence is deadly. What’s even more deadly is relying your feelings entirely on the attitudes of people around you. You need, need, NEED to learn how to entertain yourself effectively and reliably whenever people aren’t available. Find hobbies, activities, anything really that’ll help you consider yourself. We all need a base of self-respect to help us realize that other people’s actions shouldn’t ever impact our mood. Learn to appreciate yourself, whether this is through counseling, self-realization, meditation, or anything that can help. Realize that respecting oneself is the only way to be happy in this world.
Mental Illness/Sexual Assault/Assault
No tips, no tricks, and no jokes for this topic. If you are seriously suffering from a traumatic experience, mental illness, or severe condition, this is not the place for you. Instead, in this paragraph, I’ll provide some subsets you contact for therapy, counseling, and help. I seriously recommend following these as they can be life-saving and prevent you from actions that you would regret.
Realizing that we have a problem is the first step toward clarity and well-being. We went over a couple of problems in this post. But if you need more resources, we have listed them above. I wish you all the best on your journey towards a fantastic life, and until next time!